International
Journal of Recovery and 12 Step Research ™ Further
Self Analysis Exercises to Free the Mind. A
good exercise is to write out the things that have cause us great discomfort,
resentment, anger, and so on. Self analysis can appear difficult. Further, we
would really rather just make a list of all of the persons that kept us from getting
our way or caused us harm. It would be much easier to just make a blame sheet
that explains why we feel uncomfortable with others or ourselves. However,
blame is not the point. We should take a hard look at our life. What did we do
to facilitate our problems? What was our part? What were the raw feelings? By
the way, some people have suggested to be sure and list things that you like about
yourself while doing this exercise. That was a good suggestion because I make
a "what I like about myself list" occasionally, and I am reminded how
well the Universe is taking care of me. The bad stuff should be aired, vented,
and cleared away with the proper people or friends. The good stuff can be cleaned,
refined, expanded, and grown while new ideas are allowed in. Naturally, a healthy
self-esteem can be good for the spirit, attitude, and faith. To
make a long story short, we can find somebody to listen. We should schedule a
sufficient block of time. We prepare a list in advance to discuss. We spend as
much time as needed to work through the personal history to another trusted person
who is sympathetic to our growth. We should probably not to glorify a retched
past. By the way, most people feel a great deal better after this excercise. Some
people do keep a few things to themselves that they do not want the listener to
know. Soon thereafter, most people may find a professional person to discuss the
sensitive issues with. Overall, this process can be like a fountain cleansing
our soul. To
some, this process may seem like a miracle. We are free again, and we now understood
a strategy to stay free. Discuss it, diffuse it, and give it away to the power
of the universe. Begin anew with constructive thinking. One of the golden keys
to happiness and great success is the way you interpret events that unfold before
you. Highly successful people are master interpreters. People who have attained
greatness have a amazing ability in this area. They have the spiritual skill to
interpret negative events as positive challenges that will assist them in growing
and moving even farther up the ladder of success. Some of the masters can turn
rejection into healthy challenges or failure into being guided into a safe direction.
Remember, no one can insult without your permission. Jobs
and Work - How to Use Them I
don't like the idea of work. I do like a paycheck, health insurance, gaining experience
etc. To some, working is the easy part. Finding a labor of love may be a different
story for many others. Sometimes,
the idea of paying my dues within a big corporation disgusts me. Often, there
is no other way to get experience. I will say that you can get into the workforce,
secure your position, do a good job, and do a lot of research and work in the
evenings and weekends toward your other goals. You job may be the thing that leads
to opportunity, ideas, networking, etc. Never give up, and you can always search
for better jobs in your spare time. Engage life's opportunity. If you are bored,
then pick some things to do, and get busy. It
is probably good advice to keep a job until you have a clear plan of what you
will do upon leaving employment. Either have another job waiting, have a plan
to find another one, or just have a plan that commits your time to a specific
goal or endeavor.
A
Collection of Key Points and Strategies
·
Attention and energy focus: We
can chose to focus our energy on good or bad. There is a good and constructive
use of our self-will and willingness. It is prayer, gratitude, kindness, and love.
Forcing or willing ourselves to think about good, loving, harmonious, and harmless
thoughts. Willing ourselves to be better, to help others, to communicate, to be
grateful. It is much like an exercise, and showing up and doing something is the
first action into a routine that can change the focus of your state of mind. There
may be a family member who has attributes that you don't like, or your job may
have tasks that you can not stand performing. The key here is to focus your thoughts
and energy on what you do like about your life and detach from what you do not
like. What are you grateful for? It is ridiculous for me to quit my job because
I do not like 1% of the work that it entails. It is also a mistake to sabotage
my relationships with everybody because I don't like one tiny thing about them.
With that being said, if a person or position has an attribute that goes against
the very grain of your existence, you may have to separate yourself from that
job or relationship.
·
Skill and Knowledge
I
would still have endless frustration in my life if I continued to desire to be
and do things without developing an understanding of these desires. If I want
to build a wonderful website, then I may need to know how to use a web design
software. I would need to know or develop the subject matter that I will use for
the website. If I want to be a doctor, I will need to prepare to become admitted
to medical school and learn about the requirements and admissions processes. However,
if I want to be the best race car driver in the world, I may not need to know
how to repair the engine. Do you see what I am saying? You will require certain
specific skills to go toward the desires and dreams that you have. Make sure that
you are focused on what you need to know. The best surgeon in the world does not
need to know how to build the operating table or equipment, he or she just needs
to know how to use it better than anyone. If you are in sales, it helps to understand
the product or service. If you understand the product of service, you may develop
the necessary belief that the product and service is good for all who use it.
You may also learn to explain the advantages of having or using what you are selling.
The necessary understanding can come from books, school, or your advisors. The
more understanding you have, the more prepared you are to explain, defend, and
promote the item. Not only that, you will understand how to assist others with
the strategies that you now understand. If you want a direct resource, seek out
those who have achieved what you want to achieve. They can speak from personal
experience about what you need to do. You may even try to think and act like they
do. If you emulate the qualities of the best, you may become the best. ·
Family, Friends and Integrity When
you do what you say you will do and complete what you intend to do, you will be
looked upon as a person who can take action, make commitments, and be trusted.
Don't let your family get in the way of dreams. If you have a burning desire,
you should discuss it with a trusted person and get feedback. If you can refine
your desire and follow through with the dreams without being irresponsible, you
are doing the right thing. Believe me, I have a dozen good ideas per day. Maybe
all of them are feasible; however, desires mixed with passion and love will come
into being because I will be committed and faithful regarding the goal. Remember;
surround yourself with people who can give you supportive insight. Over time,
you will master the art of bringing desire to reality. Accordingly, learn to say
no when you are asked to do something that you should not do. Learn to say no
to distractions and things that limit your focus. As
a note, with your loved ones, it is better to just try and love them than to think
any disharmony toward them. Wouldn't you rather improve relationships with those
who should rightfully care about you. Some people go for years without talking
to parents or siblings over hurt feelings or a $100 dollar family heirloom. Life
is too short to throw your family in garbage. It is understandable that you may
desire to separate completely from a family member for serious reasons; however,
I have met too many people who have ruined and continue to harp on a family relationship
gone sour. In general, if a family relationship can be healed where it is healthy
for you, it is generally up to you to take action to heal it.
·
Acceptance
Acceptance
can mean coming to terms with your limitations. Being at ease with what the past
has given. Are you willing to accept a better life? The act of accepting is and
should be a receiving what is offered with satisfaction and a favorable reception.
In the practice of law the definition of acceptance can be an agreeing to the
action of another, by some act that binds the person in law. Do you see what that
means? If you accent and agree to the bargain, then you are bound to receiving
it. Overall, become willing to accept that a brighter and better life will be
yours. Believe that the universe is working to help us receive the best in life
which includes total abundance. Believe that you are a better person today, and
there is much more for you to receive in the form of gifts of life, serenity,
and happiness. Accept your misdoing, learned from them, and try to do better.
You never have to make that same mistake again. We can live in acceptance today
by being faithful, grateful, and coming to terms with ourselves. ·
Humility Here
are some thoughts on humility. I consider humility an attribute that prevents
us from allowing pride to dictate our lives. Being in tune with your place in
this world is also a part of humility. Humility also helps me realize that God
and others are responsible for the achievements of life as I alone can do nothing.
Humility is the attribute that gives me the freedom of serving the will of the
universal spirit instead of just my ego's needs.
·
Grandiosity
If
you look in the 12 Steps and 12 Traditions in the latter part of the 12th step
section, it has a great story about our expectations and dreams in life. Moreover,
it addresses our need for reasonable desires. Naturally, we may all be unrealistic
in wanting to be President of the United States without thinking the desire over.
Most of us can be what we want. Many great and wonderful positions and aspirations
require much grooming, work, skill, and patience. If we go back to the planning
stage, itemize our possibilities, review them with a friend or advisor, we may
better determine the steps needed to move forward to realize our expectations
and dreams.
Institute of 12 Step Consultants | 7800 Amelia Rd., Suite 13 | Houston | TX | 77055
|
